MENTORING
A to Z

70 topics to grow your relationships

Second Edition

by
Marilynne Miles Gray, M.A., M.Ed


I can think of at least 10 ways this book will be useful to you:

1• It's written for those people interested in self-directing their own mentoring in an intentional, proactive way.


2• I didn't want to overlook individuals who sense he or she is “too much on their own” when it comes to finding a reliable other person to assist with important areas of life (such as career choice, career development, progressing through school, going through transitions, and the like).

3• I  simply couldn't forget those of you who are not in a formal mentoring program, for whatever reason, and who wish to be in a mentoring partnership--this book will give you guidance you won't get in other publications.

4• Then too, there are those in a formal mentoring program who wish to further improve the mentoring partnership even more. I wrote the book for you as well.

5• This book is for the person who understands it’s not practical or helpful to take the attitude of “whatever happens, happens” when it comes to her or his particular mentoring relationship. You want to be as proactive as possible.

6• Then there are the folk who fall into the category of not being able to find the right mentor at the right time. This book will help you!

7• Next, I thought about the person who has “been there, done that”, has had less than stellar results in relationships and now believes it should be possible to improve the results. This book is packed with helpful material for you too.

8• This book is balanced to include information for the mentor who is determined to do an even better job—improve, refine, elevate!

9• Mentoring A to Z is for the soul who is keen to find out more about what the Dictionary of Occupational Titles called “the most complex of human interactions” (aka mentoring),

10• Finally, there are people in group mentoring situations. They can individualize their results with the expert advice and in-depth insights of this book.


Mentoring A to Z is in seven parts, arranged alphabetically, starting with the topic of Abilities and moving on through all 70 topics. The first 20 topics are listed below.
 
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Table of Contents


1

Abilities >> Concerns


 
1 Abilities—Is there such a thing as a “born” mentor? Or is it an ability honed over time?
2 Assumptions you have about mentoring—Exercises to help you discover how and why faulty assumptions can have a negative impact on the mentoring (and coaching); 7 issues relationship. Exercise.
3 Attitude—Excerpt from MentorInk Newsletter. An attitude exercise (score yourself).
4 Beliefs about mentoring —Activity with 15 either or questions; Answer Key.
5 Best outcomes—9 recommendations to give you insights; 5 questions to clarify; suggestions.
6 Bosses—Try the 8-question test.
7 Charisma—What we now know about this via research.
8 Choices—There’s lots to know. Excerpt from MentorInk Newsletter.
9 Comfort food for the relational soul—Some steps.
10 Concerns—The research; an exercise plus what even the sharpest, most experienced professionals don’t know about themselves.

 
2

Criticism >> First Meeting



11 Criticism—Suggestions, Overlook this section at your peril.
12 Dull Moments, fizzles and bombs—As the saying goes: “This has got to be a worst day ever for me.” Six suggestions to minimize these events.
13 Effective mentors—Having a mentor’s not the same as having an effective one. Try the rank order exercise.
14 Empowerment—How the British monarchy had only half the equation right. Case study. Seven ways to promote empowerment. Six Guidelines.
15 Endless cups of coffee—One of the first things proteges complained about! Seven steps to do away with wasted time and energy.
16 Equip yourself—What’s involved. Must-know list of equipping activities.
17 Expectations—Don’t have the wrong ones. Exercise. 7 limits of mentors.
18 Expertise—How rank amateurs rise beyond their level of incompetence. About the 4 Levels of Competence. Nine insights.
19 Feedback—What no-risk listeners and performance blind spots have in common. Eight ways to obtain useful feedback from a partner. The format to use. What are some performance blindspots?
20 First meeting—The power of being  nervous. Arranging a meeting.


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